USC Frat Boy Launches 'Gullet Report' For Expert Cocksman Getting Quality Pie

Street in Panama via shesezz.comThere are days when smart women just shouldn’t get up in the morning. I’m waiting for Phyllis Schlafly’s new diatribe against American feminists to hit Amazon on March 15. Schlafly’s view of women like me is:

I submit to you that the feminist movement is the most dangerous, destructive force in our society today. […] My analysis is that the gays are about 5% of the attack on marriage in this country, and the feminists are about 95%. […] I’m talking about drugs, sex, illegitimacy, drop outs, poor grades, run away, suicide, you name it, every social ill comes out of the fatherless home. ~Phyllis Schlafly

After all, we ladies should just suck it in and understand that boys will be boys. Schlafly refuses to hold men responsible for any ills in American society. In fact, smart women have totally emasculated men in her playbook.

A degrading email — allegedly from a Kappa Sigma frat boy at USC — supports my argument that American men aren’t dead doormats yet.  What’s tough for a woman like myself is that as an ardent feminist, I never fought against men, even though I am blamed for it.

My relations with men generally have been superb in my career and to a more limited extent in my personal life. I know a lot of good guys.  Being on the other end of the gender relations perspective with life experience, watching the Republicans declare war on women in Washington, working for women internationally — I do believe that misygyny runs really deep in cultures everywhere in the world.

The New Testament doesn’t speak of women all that much differently than this email.  That’s just the way it is for women in this world, and I’m exhausted with fighting the battle for recognition of women’s worth in a religious, political and social culture — including fashion — that is more misogynist than I ever wanted to believe as a starry-eyed young woman.

The USC’s Daily Trojan reinforces the fact that authorities haven’t established that the sender is actually a member of Kappa Sigma. It could be a prank from a competing fraternity, trying to discredit Kappa Sigma.

Pat Lauer, president of USC’s Interfraternity Council, condemned the email, saying:

“The e-mail is repulsive, it’s ridiculous, it’s insulting … It’s just really sad that this e-mail doesn’t reflect the standard of any fraternity or chapter in our community. What’s more shocking is that such a respected fraternity’s name is on that e-mail.”

Jezebel has printed the entire email and we will, too. In bold, I will highlight my favorite parts of this depiction of women at USC.

To the Distinguished Gentlemen of the Kappa Sigma Fraternity:

As I have mentioned I will be starting a weekly Gullet Report. In response to the Soft Report, I felt it necessary to offer a contrasting and more uplifting telegram. My theories and practices are elaborated in more detail in the body of this email.

Please send me all of your hook-ups in Tucker Max format (for those unfamiliar with this legend, google will suffice). These renditions should be elaborate and interesting. I want raw data on who fucks and who doesn’t. In conclusion the gullet report will strengthen brotherhood and help pin-point sorostitiutes more inclined to put-out. From my experience when a female goes Ksig shes typically repeats.

For your entertainment read on and pause for note taking. My hope is that ALL of our brothers will follow this creed with pride and distinction.

I have come to write this memo to you today to educate on the only life worth living, that of a Cocksman. A Cocksman is taught to live by the two most applicable principles I know: The Pie and the Gullet. You may already be lost in trying to comprehend this logic. Do not worry this is completely understandable. By the end of this memo, you will not only gain a greater understanding of what it means to live, but you will have embraced a lifestyle. However, in order for this to happen you first must know a couple key terms.

Note: I will refer to females as “targets”. They aren’t actual people like us men. Consequently, giving them a certain name or distinction is pointless.

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